Wednesday, March 31, 2010

...For The Ride Home: Jesse James goes into sex rehab and Matt Damon will appear on "30 Rock"



Because David Gray continues to ring loud through the head. We hear there may just be some people who read this particular blog, however new it may be to your conscious. Don't be afraid to check out our Twitter page, and follow us, however creepy that may sound. Saw "Up In The Air" for the second time last night. Like Xtina, it just keeps getting better. Onward and upward.

Keep the video game content coming. How NBA Jam was allowed back into your homes. (Kotaku)

Excellent read on the most popular criminal of our time. Dude's 18, and he's stolen four airplanes. (Maxim)

Matt Damon will appear on "30 Rock." (Entertainment Weekly)

The next step after hiring Tim Floyd at UTEP? Fire him. (CBS Sports)

Because sex addiction is the new hotness: Jesse James checks himself in. (People)

For all the single ladies, the most beloved single lady of them all: Jennifer Aniston loves Ricky Gervais and Drew Barrymore. (The Huffington Post)

Jon and Kate (who really needs to ditch the long hair). Together again? (Eonline)

Can the Ipad save journalism? (Newsonomics)

So who’s up for a Wii party?


When I was in college I was somewhat of a gamer – not a hardcore, virgin living in my parents basement gamer, but I got down with Madden and Halo from time to time. Ya that’s right, Madden 07; when you could still run the “Sweep Right” in the I-formation 35 times a game and still win the rushing title with Larry Johnson or Shaun Alexander (… who?). Recognize.

After college I had this lull where I had no gaming system, so my wife bought me a Nintendo Wii for Christmas last year… Yes, I am in fact a 13 year old child.



Anyways, don’t get me wrong, the Wii is super fun – I’m all about bowling and tennis and the like – but it doesn’t quite quench the thirst for a real gaming system, you know? There are no fatalities, stealthy assassinations or any of that cool blood and guts kind of stuff. There’s no controller with 10 different buttons… come to think of it, the Wii controller actually looks more like one of those “self massagers” from the Fingerhut mail order catalogs.

The Wii definitely has one distinct advantage though: it’s acceptable to have a Wii party. People come over, have a few beers, maybe an appetizer, and everyone plays and enjoy themselves. There’s nothing creepy or loserish about it all. But an Xbox 360 party? How ridiculous is that? Seriously, will the dudes (because clearly there are no females present) actually be braiding one another’s hair and playing truth or dare? Having an Xbox 360 party is up there with dudes who dress up for comic book conventions and adult baseball card collectors.



So who’s up for a Wii party?

- TS

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

...For The Ride Home: Don't forget about Amy Ryan, John Nolan comes back to Taking Back Sunday and CNN is in trouble


In honor of Jennifer Morrison being interviewed on Jimmy Fallon last night, we thought a good question to post in today's ...For The Ride Home would be one of high importance: Does she look better with blond hair? The way she was talking last night, though, getting caught up on "House" is becoming more and more mandatory. In other things learned last night, if you are interested in meeting said woman, your chances may increase if you tweet her. And, well, live in New York.

Conan O Brien is getting ready for his tour. (Twitter)

A great read and listen on one of the most underrated actresses in the universe, Amy Ryan. (NPR)

If Anderson Cooper and Larry King's ratings are down, you know CNN is in trouble. (New York Times)

Lisa De Moraes may be the best tounge-in-cheek writing the Washington Post has: "We, however, like to think of it as a much hotter "Ice Road Truckers." (Washington Post)

For fans of "The Office." (Schrute Farms)

To avoid history, the New Jersey Nets beat...The Spurs? And earlier in the year, they beat...The Celtics? (ESPN)

John Nolan is coming back to Taking Back Sunday. (Alternative Press)

A different take: The financial fallout of Ricky Martin coming out of the closet. (Wall Street Journal)

It's already been 25 years. Can you believe it? (Popmatters)

Tiger begins his journey back... no, seriously... Yeah, the same Tiger from CNN with the apology and stuff...

It was reported late last week that Tiger Woods began filming his first commercial since the incident... err... 15 incidents that became public around Thanksgiving. The commercial will be for Tiger's most prominent sponsor, Nike. So, this obviously begs the question, is this a good move on Nike's part? My first instinct says Nike needs to maintain its distance from the fallen former prodigy - but is that a bit short sighted on my part? If there's one thing America loves, it's a winner, and you know Tiger will win again. And for better or for worse, winning seems to be the cure-all elixir for public image problems among professional athletes, Dwight Gooden notwithstanding.

(Seriously, give this video a minute before moving on - so worth it.)



Now we've all heard the juvenile golf jokes and immature quips about some of the companies who have sponsored, or continue to sponsor Tiger Woods (Nike - Just do it; Accenture - High performance delivered; and my personal favorite Gatorade - Is it in you?). And while I typically would avoid such childish cheap shots, I can't help myself here. Here's a little list of some companies and their tag lines (past or present) that Tiger could consider aligning himself with - feel free to add to this list.

L'Oreal - "Because I'm worth it"
Timex - "It takes a licking and keeps on ticking."
Las Vegas - "What happens here stays here"
AT&T - "Reach out and touch someone"
Energizer - "It just keeps going and going"
Holiday Inn - "Pleasing people the world over"
Courage Tavern Ale - "It's what your right arm's for"
Exxon - "Put a little tiger in your tank"

Scene.

We'll be here all week folks - leave comments, let's discuss.

- TS

Monday, March 29, 2010

...For The Ride Home: Alex Chilton was important and Katy Perry is still kissing girls

There are some blogs who start the day with a plethora of links for you, the lovely reader, to browse upon throughout your work day, or, for that matter, while you suffer through a professor's lecture. This blog? Well, we plan to post our collection of links for you to ponder toward the end of the day. Because honestly, who's actually still thinking about work after 2 p.m., anyways? Besides, by the time you get home, you always need something to fall back on when Yahoo isn't working, right?

Did you know Alex Chilton was planning on performing at SXSW? (Pitchfork)

Vanity Fair hates The Huffington Post (Mediaweek)

Women. Sex. Pregnancy. (CNN)

Katy + Russell can't last more than two years (MTV)

Jim Marshall died. John Mayer cared. (One Forty)

Because the New York Jets were in the AFC title game this year. (New York Times)

Norman Chad and media feuds. (Washington Post)

Yep. That Genesis reunion is never going to happen. (Rolling Stone)

Something's got to give in Roethlisberger case


So, the Pittsburgh Steelers' offseason condition program began today. ESPN's Adam Schefter reported last night that quarterback Ben Roethlisberger will indeed not be reporting to the program, deflating the collective ballon of those who were hoping to hear from the over-sized, "gee-I-look-like-a-normal-dude" superstar.

Tony Kornheiser had Washington Post sports reporter Mark Maske on his radio show last Wednesday and discussed an issue that only a select few have decided to tackle: The divide between how NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell has responded to this particular incident in comparison with, oh, say Pacman Jones, and the racial undercurrent of such an issue that was initially tackled by the often rambunctious Jamele Hill.

"Ben Roethlisberger is not unlike Pacman Jones in the sense that Pacman Jones was never convicted of anything, but kept getting in trouble, kept being talked to by the police, and Goodell said, 'you know what, enough is enough, and I'm suspending this dope for a while.' ... You can't have a double standard of justice for a black defensive back and a white quarterback, and the players are going to say, 'wait a second now.' ...This can very easily become racial politics, don't you think?" the PTI host asked.

"I think it's true," Maske responded. "The personal conduct policy empowers the commissioner to act before the legal process is played out. It empowers the commissioner to impose league discipline even if the player is not charged with a crime. That comparison to the handling of the Pacman Jones case .... I think all of those things will come up. All of those things will be talked about, and those will have to be factors that are taken into consideration when the time comes to make the decision on Roethlisberger."


Then, of course, there's this, and there's this. Interesting, isn't it? OTAs begin April 19. When's he going to show? When's he going to talk? The longer he waits, is Goodell more inclined to dish a punishment out? That said, if he's innocent, why hasn't he rushed to clear his name, much like he did the last time he found himself in this type of mess.

This isn't Marc Bulger, Alex Smith, Tyler Palco or even Tony Romo. This is a two-time Super Bowl winning quarterback who can't dodge controversy no matter how hard his team of handlers try, and no matter how polished the Rooney's idea of the Pittsburgh Steelers may be perceived. Something's got to give, but who's going to be the first to give it? Roethlisberger and a hollow apology? Or Goodell and a legacy-damaging suspension?

Remember how low Pacman Jones sunk? No? This may help.



-TU

Sunday, March 28, 2010

March Madness or Michael Buble... Bring on Buble.

Is it less masculine to hate college basketball in March or love Michael Buble all year round? For my money, I’d take the Canadian crooner over March Madness any day. Honest to God, our ears haven’t experienced a serenader like Buble since Old Blue Eyes himself… Forget beer, forget maple syrup and forget the hilarious images of lawmen riding around on horses – Canada’s greatest gift to the U.S. is clearly this foxy balladeer.

And what’s up with all the references to homosexuality every time this heartthrob’s name is mentioned? For the most part, musically anyways, the dude unmistakably pays homage to a group of guys who cleared the way for the acceptance of male chauvinism, the practice of slipping roofies into drinks and the degradation of women-folk worldwide... wait a minute…



And college basketball in March… Forgive this for sounding terse, but seriously, who cares? For 11 months out of every year, we all could give two craps about who Murray State, Robert Morris and (insert obligatory no-name school here) are. Then all of the sudden they’re in a tournament with the five college teams we HAVE heard of and we all decide to take sick days from work to catch a few games? Now I understand I’m probably in the minority here, but I just find it more entertaining to watch the PROFESSIONALS as opposed to the AMATEURS. I mean, does anyone feverishly watch minor league baseball? Other than the friends and family of those on the field – I doubt it. Could I do what these guys do? Absolutely not; they’re all finely tuned athletic machines. I just don’t get the fan obsession I suppose.

And the worst part of March Madness… SportsCenter. There must be some official memo sent out to all ESPN staff that states “During the month of March, if anyone so much as mentions hockey, football, baseball, golf or any other athletic event that is NOT college basketball, disciplinary action will be taken and you will not be a part of our hilarious commercials.”



To paraphrase the late, great comedian Mitch Hedberg, if SportsCenter during the month of March was a pie chart about what you would do if you found $1 million, college basketball would be the “Keep it” portion of the pie chart. All other sports combined would be the “Donate it to charity” slice.



- The Suspect

Saturday, March 27, 2010

The Wire: Livin' a 'Treme' second life?

So, this show is set to debut in April. Why does that matter? Well, that’s because David Simon is the individual spearheading it. Why should that matter? Well, that’s because the last show David Simon spearheaded was, by some accounts, the best television show to ever grace the small screen. Come on, now. College courses have been developed and taught around the very premise of The Wire. Be fair, Sopranos fans. Before you go and renew your treasurer’s card for the Paulie Gualtieri fan club, consider how less of a shot Simon’s creation was given (time slot, amount of seasons, etc.) and consider the amount of acclaim his show received. There aren’t many Wikipedia entries that have six citations by the sentence “The Wire has been described by critics as the greatest television series ever made.”



Excited? Of course. Reluctant? That’s got a Sarah Palin “You Betcha” written all over it. Reason one: John Goodman plays a prominent role in the trailer. Reason two: Simon just can’t get enough of Lester Freamon and Bunk Moreland and now, for a reason not even Officer McNulty could figure out, the creator wants to turn both into credible musicians in New Orleans (let’s be honest. To look and these dudes and not think they are working for the good guys is like looking at James Gandolfini and thinking Where The Wild Things Are instead of Tony Soprano). Oh, and did we mention John Goodman plays a prominent role in the trailer?  

Cool: Kermit Ruffins is set to play himself in the series. Who’s that? This may help. A mainstay in the New Orleans music scene for decades is only going to give more credibility to the show. That said, the one thing Simon may never need help with is gaining points on the credibility meter after creating the most raw, in-your-face television show of the 2000s, if not ever. 

Be careful, former newspaper man. We know you know that genius only comes once in a blue moon, let alone for five seasons. Capturing that again may be harder than it was trying to convince us McNulty was actually a good guy deep beneath the cheating heart and alcoholic exterior. Tread carefully along those New Orleans rivers.

- The Unusual

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Inquire Within - March 27 kickoff date

Immediate openings for qualified readers interested in viewing everyday life through the veil of endearing sarcasm. Ideal candidates have excellent communication skills, keep an open mind, laugh when prompted, roll eyes when justified and reply quite often. We offer competitive compensation in the form of semi-witty banter, occasionally funny social commentary and a never-ending slew of self deprecating anecdotes. Compensation will be commensurate with experience. Inquire within.

Start date: Saturday, March 27.
End date: Nowhere in sight.

Seriously, let's converse on Saturday, March 27. It's a date...